How to have gay sex porn

Navigate the scenario

You don’t owe anyone a “this is my first time” speech but it might stop you from hyperfocusing on reaching the expert level immediately.

“The decision to disclose your sexual history or experiences, including whether it's your first time with someone of the same sex, is a personal one,” Spelman explains.

Sexual desire exists on a spectrum just like gender, sexuality, and other fluid and fluctuating parts of our identities. “You can’t just shove something up there when you’re not into it,” he says. “You might feel a really sharp pain at first but it will go away after a few seconds. So not all of the positions or actions they do will be as pleasurable for you or your partner.

Don’t let porn be the standard for your sex life or be disappointed if it’s a little more awkward or messy.

Real-life sex tends to be funny and awkward when you’re first working out where things go and what feels good.

In 2021, it’s painfully heteronormative to presume that sexual intercourse has to involve a hole being filled by something cock-shaped.

On one level, bottoming is really no big deal – if you like riding dick, go ahead and ride it.

But on another, butt-fucking is still cloaked in myth and stigma. This is your space. 

What to know about oral sex with a vagina:

Vaginas are all unique and most of the key operations take place in the brain. 

To enjoy this pleasure center to its fullest, create a comfortable environment and communicate while enjoying other erogenous zones on the way down.

Don’t worry, there are flotation devices! “Start small, with one finger. As we’ve said before, these people are often in controlled environments with strict HIV and STI testing in place. Are you trying a group sex experience? Experimenting with someone you trust is part of the fun. “Then there are some bottoms who douche every time because they want to know, definitively, that they’re clean and ready to go.

Don’t compare yourself to these models, everybody and every dick is beautiful, no matter the shape, size, colour, etc.

Most porn you watch these days doesn’t involve condoms. “Just listen to your body and let your partners know that sometimes they may experience some sounds and smells,” Howley recommends. When it comes to gay and bi men, a lot of people seem kind of obsessed with working out who’s a top/giver and who’s a bottom/receiver, but in reality many MSM (men who have sex with men) do both and some do neither.

Some even like to define themselves as a “power bottom” – a bottom who calls the shots.

When you get into the swing of it, bottoming can feel both subtly subversive – take that, patriarchy! Educate yourself

Sex education in schools is still a long way from being capable of guiding people through all the realms of sexuality safely.

It empowers them.”

Bradley, a 38-year-old gay man from Durham who asked us to withhold his surname when discussing “intimate details” of his sex life, has been bottoming his “entire sexual life”. “Some LGBTQ+ individuals may enjoy having parts of their body stimulated in ways that fit with their gender, or body parts called differently to what they were told at birth.”

Experiment with sex toys, techniques, and positions.